Giving

The gift to give is often accompanied by the feeling of jubilation and joy like none ever experienced before.  It is a feeling that only comes from just being able to give without thinking twice about it or happened to pull off next to a miracle on behalf of the recipient.  

I once read a book called Riding the Dragons (I can’t remember the author unfortunately) and the author wrote about a Priest who used to make sandwiches and give them out to the less fortunate.  It was something he did every day until one day someone noticed, the news caught the attention of the media and he ended up as some sort of mini celebrity.  On reading about this some people started sending the Priest cheques and money for him to make more sandwiches to give to the homeless and those without.  The Priest sent back all the cheques with a simple message saying along the lines of “Use the money yourself to give out food to those less privileged”.

The lesson he wanted to teach was a simple one.  Give because you want to.  Give because you feel it in you to give.  Don’t give because you want someone to say “Thank you” or to be noticed.  If someone refuses your gift you shouldn’t feel rejected because the intention of giving should never be to seek a reaction from the receiver.  It should never be for the other person to accept.  Give freely and if your gift is turned down accept that as graciously as you do when someone accepts your offer.  It should be with grace.  When we seek personal glory from giving we truly lose the meaning of giving.  I know I used the analogy of the sandwiches but this applies to all things we give including money, accommodation, a lift and even advice. 

Advice among money, clothes and food causes contention amongst people.  Mostly because if one is less privileged they may be made to feel more so depending on the way the giver behaves towards them.  Sometimes givers can be very patronising.  They make it hard to say no to their gifts...and when one says no they are made to feel ashamed.  Giving that comes from wanting to attract attention or for want of keeping tags results in most people feeling let down for finding themselves in a situation where they are at the messy of others.  Instead of the receiver feeling empowered they may be left feeling even more sad or even depressed.  There is no shame in receiving and there is nothing wrong with giving.  The most important thing is to learn to meet each other half way in the spirit of togetherness. 

Dare to dream of a better world when it is not a crime to need and where there is no shame in accepting help.  This can only happen if those who have more don’t feel they are worth more than those without.  I don’t mean just those with more goods than they can use but even those with more ideas or who are better at formulating them than others because receiving should leave one with a warm fuzzy feeling the same way giving does.